Paul Kelly - Stolen Apples

Alex Skinner 14/10/2008

Rating: 1/5

Australian singer/ songwriter Paul Kelly can be taken in two forms. You can enjoy his heartfelt, textured, bluesy country twangy music that's spanned, over thirty years. Or you can think of him as one of the most annoying voices in the industry. In one respect, he is the musical equivalent of marmite/ vegemite. The album set up genuinely fails but has good intentions, like a Para-Olympian it fails to clear the first hurdle. Paul Kelly gathered inspiration from what Neil Young managed to do on tour by playing the entire album, then a collection of his greatest hits. I would rather sow my arms to my legs and legs to my arms. Does anyone who gives a rats behind about Paul Kelly's latest effort? If anyone: probably those Texan Christians? Otherwise, It may be good soundtrack to any potential torture scenes in the latest Bond film.

Subtle Christian acoustic music that attempts to brainwash people in a child-catcher fashion through acoustic palaver is wrong. Religious themes in music are not cool. The God forsaken album seems to drone on through the quivering i<>'You're 39, You're Beautiful and You're Mine' that's lame, woe ridden lyrics make little sense. The whining drone is ongoing in 'The Lion and The Lamb' right until the remaining drivel of 'Please Leave Your Light On' that's just awful. 'Stolen apples,' poppycock, more like sour apples, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, ha, ah. For the love of God it's weak! The 'Live Apples' bonus disc it comes with is dire too. It sounds like the same applause after every harrowing song. Just like a Para-Olympian long jumper (it falls short).